Archive for the ‘Funnies’ Category

Mar
06

Friday funny 04

Tags: ,   •  Posted in : Funnies |

Two couples were playing poker one evening. Jim accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Bob’s wife, Sue wasn’t wearing any underwear under her dress! Shocked by this, Jim upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced. 

Later, Jim went to the kitchen to get some refreshments. Bob’s wife followed and asked, ‘Did you see anything that you like under there?’ 

Surprised by her boldness, Jim admitted that, well indeed he did. 

She said, ‘Well, you can have it but it will cost you £500.’ 

After taking a minute or two to assess the financial and moral costs of  this offer, Jim confirms that he is interested. Sue told him that since her husband Bob worked Friday afternoons and Jim didn’t, Jim should be at her house around 2 p.m. Friday afternoon. 

When Friday rolled around, Jim showed up at Bob’s house at 2 p.m. sharp -  and after paying Sue the agreed sum of £500 – they went to the bedroom and closed their transaction, as agreed.  Jim quickly dressed and left. 

As usual, Bob came home from work at 6 p.m.-And upon arriving, asked his wife: ‘Did Jim come by the house this afternoon?’ 

With a lump in her throat Sue answered ‘Why yes, he did stop by for a few minutes this afternoon.’ 

Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her husband curtly asked, ‘And did he give you £500?’ 

Sue, using her best poker face,replied, ‘Well, yes, in fact he did give me £500.’ 

Bob, with a satisfied look on his face, surprised his wife by saying, ‘He came by the office this morning and borrowed £500 from me. He promised he’d stop by our house this afternoon on his way home and pay me back.’ 

Now THAT, my friends, is a poker player!

Feb
13

Friday Funny 03

Tags: ,   •  Posted in : Funnies |

Nominated as the world’s best short joke of the year.

A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
‘Mom’, he asked, ‘Are these my brains?’
‘Not yet,’ she replied.

Feb
06

Friday Funny 02

Tags: ,   •  Posted in : Funnies |

Here’s some funny pics with the title ‘FAILED’

Jan
25

Friday funny 001

Tags: ,   •  Posted in : Funnies |

Here’s a ‘funny I got through on email…

When I grow up

Dear Mrs. Jones,
I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer.
I work at Home Depot and I told my daughter how hectic it was last week before the blizzard hit. I told her we sold out every single shovel we had, and then I found one more in the back room, and that several people were fighting over who would get it. Her picture doesn’t show me dancing around a pole. It’s supposed to depict me selling the last snow shovel we had at Home Depot.
From now on I will remember to check her homework more thoroughly before she turns it in.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Smith